Obama Seeks Commerce Secretary, Skiis

Breaking news on Huffington Post:

“The position of Commerce Secretary is too important to remain unfilled another day,” Mr. Obama said.  “That’s why it is absolutely essential that this Craigslist thing work.”

President Obama reportedly scanned the “sporting goods” category for bargains while he was at it.

6 Responses to “Obama Seeks Commerce Secretary, Skiis”

  1. Sean Says:

    Similar (the same?) news broke in The Onion:

    http://www.theonion.com/content/node/53282

  2. Irene Says:

    WHEN WILL THE BAIL OUT MONEY
    GET TO THE E.D.D. OFFICE TO PAY
    OUR UNEMPLOYMENT ?

  3. Kelli Lord Says:

    I’ve been laid off since October.
    I’ll take the position of Commerce Secretary.
    Any Day.

  4. Chuck Says:

    The only requirment is yours taxes must not be more than 10 years past due.

  5. Richard Says:

    I believe I would be absolutely perfect for this job.
    I’ve been looking for a job for quite a while. Then
    I began to have extreme pain in my shoulder.
    My longtime back problems have increased.
    So I’ve applied for disability I’m finding it to be
    a very speedy process so speedy in fact,
    that I may not be able to die fast enough,

    Being disabled I find that I have failing memory,
    this gives me perfect plausible deniability. So
    I can screw things up. And well I just forgot.
    So now I can vote myself or raise, for being
    so wonderfully forgetful.

    It’s my inabilities that make me perfect for the job.
    The great thing about a government job, is that
    the more you screw up, the bigger you make the crises
    the more money you need to screw it up even more.
    I’m perfect for that kind of job.

    Hey I need all the help I can get. As I can’t seem to die,
    fast enough to get my SSI and SSDI. I paid into it quick, they got thers before I got mine, and now it might
    take the rest of my life to get mine back. Such a speedy process don’t you agree. if you don’t agree. Send check or money order to: Richard Bobb PO box 1305 Fallbrook California 92088. Thanks for your support.

    I tip my hat to the new revolution, take a bow for the new constitution. I’m not free there’s a change all around. Pick up my guitar and play, just like yesterday. I get on my knees and pray. We don’t get fooled again. And again, and again. And again.

  6. Luke Skywalker Says:

    Use the force

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